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Poetry by Topiltzin

Please Return My Loneliness - Topiltzin © 2015

Scene. Late night. My door. Your.

Heart. Desperation felt deep. You.

Had mascara down your cheek. Dress.

Tightly worn. Hair amiss, adorn. Still.

Image burned. Forever the stage. I.

More than welcomed. The end. You're.

Here before me. To love me, to hold. Me.

Willing. Left. Without withdrawal. Fool. I.

Feel now, what I could not. Then. When.

In front of my eyes. The beauty within. Was.

Outside my door. Clinging. Hoping. Crying.

I love you. Love me. I'm yours. If only. You.

Take me, as you have before. Over and over. I.

Rewind this dream. Loving you now. As.

You deserved. Then. I was, self absorbed. You.

Tried to hand me a crown. Anoint me. With.

Your body. Nightly. I reigned. No one but. I.

Could love you. As I did. I do. The difficult. Thing.

The crown is old. Worn. Rusted. But kept. I.

Feverishly accept. If you wake me. Before. I.

Fall asleep again. Writing in-between. Of. That.

Moment, compared to now. My God. You.

Did love. You do love. It's time. For my door. Flung.

This crown. To be openly worn. If you'll bestow. It. Me. You. We.

 

Law of Attraction - Topiltzin © 2012

New is not made of triumphant parades, palm leaves or reverent worth.

It is fashioned of tribulation, sweat and blood.

The pangs of birth.

From the very start I seen it coming.

Magnetic, is it me, is it her?

Premonitions, preconceived deep within, doom pending.

No fault, no blame, fate has bequeathed our raw verses.

As a train, full steam, no avoidance without derailing.

Eyes undressed to conspire.

No U-turns, road to hell and I accelerate my running.

 

Which Kiss - Topiltzin © 2017

Infront of a restaurant window, pure passion, lost in her lips.

A night together, cuddled so warmly with her loving caress.

We outlasted the crowd, in the cold rain, a perfect goodnight kiss.

The first greeted me to bliss, the other assured me completely, I will be missed.

 

Repetition - Topiltzin © 2002

I breathe, I breathe, I breathe.

To kill, to kill, to kill.

You die, you die, you die.

I live, I live, I live.

I breed, I breed, I breed.

I teach, I teach, I teach.

Must break the cycle.

 

Loneliness Endured - Topiltzin © 2015

I wander her soft cream hips.

I am mesmerized, legs together, making a perfect alabaster heart.

Her body seems to be a magnet for my eyes, hands, lips.

A curve, a brush stroke, a fleshed out work of art.

New thoughts, uninhibited fantasy, live play without a script.

My nerves race in memory, aroused before start.

Alone, lonely, the sun of desire, moon ensconced by love's eclipse.

 

Alive - Topiltzin © 2015

At night I dream, vivid images in my mind.

Your alluring silhouette, enticingly it glides.

My passion, my love, through you, I shall find.

Erotic, the penetrating look in your eyes.

You touch with purpose, perfect body searching mine.

Heavy breathe, our sweat dripped bodies entwine.

I enter, you gasp, our naked souls combine.

Oh to kiss your mouth, make my seductive dream come alive.

 

Without You. Within I. - Topiltzin © 2015

No matter how undeserving I be.

I continue to benefit daily.

Therefore I pray in the dark.

Not to enlighten my heart.

But that you receive more than I.

Yes, you, unbeknownst blessed of mine.

 

Friendship On Fire - Topiltzin © 2016

You are less than perfection.

You are my allowance for human weaknesses.

Slowly burning, mind consuming, physically absorbing.

Just enough to allow me to enjoy you without obsessive need of you.

A quiet understanding of mercy and cruelty.

  

Still I Moan - Topiltzin © 2012

Reach around to touch, skin, flesh, throbs.

Rise up to raise me, just to thrust down.

Welcoming liquefied, soft, sticky, hot.

Motion by rhythm, vibe, heart pounding sound.

Grasping, pulsing, intense, eye to eye locked.

Closer, moving towards, the moment profound.

Relentlessly determined, passion nonstop.

Entered with firmness, exit by ecstasy unbound.

 

My Tainted Love - Topiltzin © 2016

I dreamt of you recently, last night, tomorrow, always.

You were possessed by an angel, writhed in ecstasy and sang a song of worship.

I knew every line of the lyrics; I hummed the rhythm along to Tainted Love.

This bedeviled me, jealous, causing me to threaten the messenger.

"I exorcise you clean spirit, I will find you in the very arches of heaven if you do not release her, you can't hide from me child of light!"

Shaken by my liberated fall, frightened he left your soul, I held you so tight as we cried.

I awoke, guilt ridden, damned by my love.

 

The Longing - Topiltzin © 2015

You are the moon and I the sun, always aware of each other, but have never set eyes upon one another.

I only know the rumors of your beauty, how your body radiates to brighten the darkened earth when I am gone.

The entire world ebs and flows in desire, oceans dance in ritual for your love.

Daily I chase you, peaking over the horizon to catch a glimpse, continually I miss my chance.

Yet, I promise for eternity I shall shine my best, so that I may touch the moon through my own reflection of light upon her.

  

Ode to a Parasite - Topiltzin © 2015

Vampire, succubus, fungus, disease.

Unaware is the host of which you leech.

I am, trust that, believe you me.

If not expelled, the life you freely taste shall no longer be.

I, even I, will not be so naive.

To listen, pay mind to, consider, take heed.

Your false words, manipulations or mendacious pleas.

But make haste to end you, the pestilent flea.

For beneath my heel is the last sight you will see.

 

Infinity - Topiltzin © 2015

It is not as though we do not know, simply deeper, deeper I plunge.

Without inhale, breathing you, pulled beneath, I drown.

Losing consciousness, minus thought, you are the total sum.

Of fears, of hopes, of dreams, of madness, the eternity of my doubt.

Left with yearning, ridiculed, burned by love and shunned.

By the loss of nothing, of everything, of what it could have been about.

Cleansed, forgiven, exculpated, exonerated, absolved, expunged.

Forgotten, the infinite cycle re-turns to me, the queen has reclaimed her crown.

 

Needing Her - Topiltzin © 2011

Something is wrong, the situation is without.

Neither an ounce of what, nor an idea of why.

Palpable as light, sleepless full of doubt.

Wide awake nightmares, dreams with open eyes.

Animal instinct, a natural understanding.

Subhuman behavior, a discernible feeling.

Devolved, degenerate human being.

Inborn characteristic, impulse without reason.

No thought, robotic. To simply be is not living.

Biological pattern of a lower species.

Mind adrift, only motion.

Survival is base tendency.

Thinking is painful, difficult contemplation.

Moving forth as though I accept my lot.

Moment after moment, infinite repetition.

Ticking away, driven by life, I go on and on.

 

I Know You - Topiltzin © 2011

She glides in unaware, at the intensity of my glare.

Full attention of my psyche focused upon my stare.

Uncontrolled hunger, illicit appetite, desire to taste.

Undress, heavy breathe, warm skin, rapid tear.

Unrestrained glances gratify the senses.

Every blink rend apart into pieces, stripping her soul bare.

Passionate for what’s lost, was not, nor never came to be.

Times of loneliness, desperation, anger, disappointment and fear.

Unbroken, unsullied, ambitious and free.

Her movements exude, her body absorbs.

Before my eyes, I knew you, for every curve I formed.

 

 Heaven or Hell - Topiltzin © 2015

Once there was a woman, a beautiful woman, even in namesake she is left alone.

Sunshine she carried, naked paradise, out of others hearts she wrought a thrown.

Stealing away love, looting dreams, as she whispered prayers to find her own.

Her tin prince had come, shining convincingly, so she discarded her pauper like a stone.

Absorbing more than her share, realizing the false depth was shallow, regretting her seeds sown.

Chasing her heaven, purposeless, running to and fro, now in hell she is home.

 

A Wolf Crying for the Moon - Topiltzin © 2012

Distance is how my mind survives.

Only knowing how to stop the inevitable, never learned to begin.

Reaching conclusions about the genesis.

Spent the last days full of thought, until the end.

Trying to recall every moment of my past, a sign of direction, any semblance of sense.

Beautifully pale above me, perfectly shining bright.

It took a second to remember it all at once.

My death by moonlight.

 

Childish Things - Topiltzin © 2015

Gone are the days, passed away is the time.

Distant, climaxed, rhythms of knowing I sung.

Lascivious form, you were fleshed out sublime.

My eyes were wide shut, open to your siren lute strum.

Insidious moans sent a chill down my spine.

Not a moment is given and I refused you not one.

Subjugated, confused, inconsistently blind.

Oblivious, entrapped in a web venomously spun.

Violently ending my lie, writhing together we lied.

Rotten, desecrated, dissolved by your tongue.

Angel fallen, fell off the pedestal, blemished divine.

Your cries to the heavens unheard, unanswered prayers go numb.

Haughtily unwilling to admit your victimless crime.

I am cured, relieved, the blessings of being so wronged.

For your life is stripped bare, but my spirit lives on.

I, evolved, no longer the child.

You the harlot, so thus you are gone.

  

The Influence of Me - Topiltzin © 2014

The Influence Of Me.

Because possibly, without it, you would not be.

Nonexistent, the very idea of you invented fancifully.

Pretend, chimerical, imaginary.

An obscure fictitious character of the opening scene.

Absent, not present, hallucinatory.

A notion unthought, a ghost passing through, vaguely.

Literary illusion, a voided myth lacking a hero, empty.

Irrelevant, insubstantial, living life indistinguishably.

The only sign of your presence is that I allow you to breath.

So shut your face, know your place, be grateful and thank me.

 

Cleveland Spring - Topiltzin © 2016

First day of Spring, a snowflake falls, unique, different, distinct from the norm.

Melted before it lands, unfelt, unseen, gone without a trace.

Loved for her imperfection, he adored the calmness within the storm.

Unconditional, unconquerable, impossible to embrace.

The tumultuous journey of how we were both well unformed.

Our spoken words are branded, burned, unable to erase.

Forgive me snowflake, I am yet to be Spring, unintentional in my harm.

Hope of hopes to be remembered as a dried tear upon her face.

Only then will it be worth the cost of bitter coldness amongst the warmth.

 

I Plead - Topiltzin © 2016

Fade to black knight in shining armor with piercing sword I rise.

My hidden mask beneath the face, so fragile with lovelorn eyes.

You the damsel of distress, I the heroic villain in disguise.

Shattered upon my heart of stone, glass slipper dreams are piled.

Reach out to touch my emptiness, I yearn for you to be all but mine.

The artist of the passion unseen, meticulously unwritten by what I write.

Masterpiece of canvases, painted blank, our forlorn history revised.

Scattered within the filth, inside the tomb the dead past doth writhe.

To be forgotten about again, the reword penned by the uninspired.

Quick to relay the message, broken emotions, amongst the ruin of my mind.

The repetition of this play, recycled, will replay for all time.

Forever gone, always here, nowhere eternally am I.

Never ending, tortured soul, I pretend that I am fine.

My guilt lies within, the shamelessness of which I lie.

For unrequited loving you, truly, is the punishment of my crime.

Inspired by Pain - Topiltzin © 2011
Inspired by pain, suffering and grief.
Winter death of dear friends, losses that add to me.
Slumber of the living, life vibration that exacerbates my shame.
How can I want you, when those I choose are missed.
Perhaps it is fate that keeps us apart, destiny has better plans than dust for you.
She is cruel to show me the cup, without a sip, increasing my thirst.
Forcing me to continue, motivated to evolve, to live.
To wonder when, without question we shall meet again, a mule cannot be moved without seeing the carrot dangled before it.
No longer caring where I’ve been, unconcerned about where I’m led.
Knowing you’ll be the destination in the end.

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Articles by Topiltzin

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